For a long time, I did not write this post.
Weird English, but there it is.
This has been on my heart. And it has only deepened.
Then recently a friend shared a song on facebook. The video song was done really well. Okay, so some of the dance moves were a little disturbing to this ex-Menno, so for that reason, I didn’t repost it. 🙂 But it was hysterical. And the message screamed through my soul…
The song was about those of us who “went out with a friend for coffee, and to ‘catch up’, and left with a whole line of skincare products”.
A line the song kept repeating was, “If you’re my friend, then you’ll buy it”.
And recently I also read a very well written article on multi-level marketing businesses. And how we can either send the high level executive of a chain store to retirement early, or we can help a mom who is trying to work from home instead of leaving her kids and working outside of her home. I really agreed. So much.
I am not against moms working from home. I LOVE that! I am constantly thinking up schemes to make a little money on the side! And for many moms, this is the only income. I really want it to work for them.
But in this blog post, I am going to speak for “the rest of us”.
We feel used.
Not every time. Not by every friend with one of these businesses.
But way too often. We feel used.
I was at a party recently where when inquiring on how you even get started with a business like this, the answer was: “You do need to call in a few favors from family and friends.” That’s where my interest went out the window.
I have gone to parties both on facebook, and in person, simply because I love my friends. And I saw that almost no one else was going to attend the party. I am coming to realize, however, that this is not because my friends don’t have friends! It’s because we have all been to every party multiple times. There is a norwex party around every corner. Usborne. Spa. Jamberry.
Every corner. That’s why it’s so hard to have enormous parties. The parties that we really need to be able to buy things.
I am not going to sit here judging anyone. Saying that people are getting rich and making us miserable at the bottom rung.
But these products, almost without fail, are overpriced. Or maybe life just is this expensive. I don’t know. But I was kind of screaming at Craig the other day. Because I LOVE these products! I LOVE what Biocleanse and Probio5 do for me! I adore jamberry nails. Lemongrass Spa? It’s like my own skincare business we had years ago, on super steroids. Amazing stuff. Someday, I want a whole library of Usborne books. And (I think) I want to clean my house with norwex. (I’m not positive about the long term effect of silver in my bloodstream…?) But norwex is so incredibly cool! And don’t get me started on 31 bags. I LOVE those bags.
But I said to Craig, “If someone comes up with these amazing products, then sell it like a MAN!”
But I went on to muse on how it works. And how you have people to mentor you. How many people learned everything they know and use about business, through one of these deals. And how cool that is. The product we use in our roofing business comes from Conklin. And we have an amazing mentor who has done so very much for us in training and support.
I can’t knock the way these businesses are set up.
But every time I sit down to be okay with it all, the feeling works itself back up.
Used. By my friends.
And it’s not cool.
And I know that my friends DO NOT mean to use me. They do not have this in their heart! But when perfectly amazing and lovely ladies don’t care that I am using up my last pennies just to help their downline make her party work…it hurts. Amen.
There is one reason I didn’t write this post. (Until now) That is because I so, so do not want to hurt anyone. Freak anyone out. Make anyone cry. Cut off any friendships.
You are probably not the friend who has made me feel used, okay?! I have friends who have these businesses, who NEVER made me feel this way. That is probably you. 🙂
In fact, I have a friend who recently posted on facebook and said, “Does anyone want to purchase any jamberry nails so that I can make my order?” or something like that. And the straightforwardness of it was like a balm to my soul.
It wasn’t, “YOU will love this and you NEED it!”…all the while silently begging you to buy something so that they can afford it for themselves as well. And I have no money. So I just feel…bad. And publicly poor. 🙂
I guess the purpose of this post is one: to make each of us aware of how “the rest of us” feel. How much we long to just go out with you for coffee, and catch up. How we love to see your kids, your cooking, your crafts…on facebook. And every time you rave about your business product, we cringe inside. Because we know you want us to sign up under you. And we want you to be successful! So much! But we don’t want to sign up. And we don’t have money to buy the products. But you are amazing. And a really good friend.
Facebook is a really good place to market products. And we as friends can help each other by sharing and liking and commenting!
What hurts is when I am your means of getting ahead. Can’t explain it all in words. But the hurt is there. So that’s why I’m sharing this.
Love you all.
<3 <3 <3